I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
