giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize