He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize