you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
