At least make sure they are 18
Why
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
