therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
