i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
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