I wish I only lived at night.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
