True but thats because hes a fetus.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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