this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
