DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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