weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize