This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
