Your mouth is God's brothel.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
