I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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