So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
