Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize