So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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