we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
