Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize