How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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