so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
