Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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