Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
