You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Randomize
