ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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