just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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