I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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