Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize