I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
