Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize
