You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
