Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Randomize