Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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