I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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