Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Randomize
