I'm laying in your front yard are you home
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
