At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
My bed smells like the plague
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
