I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
foreskin is a definite game changer
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
