Ambien. No doubt about it.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
