I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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