I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
