he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
