you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
