Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
