Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Dicks are not precious.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
