He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
