Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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