He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
