have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
